Cold in July by Joe Lansdale

First published in 1989; movie tie-in published by Tachyon in 2014; published digitally by Particle Books on July 10, 2018

Joe Lansdale often writes novels and stories that are funny and playful, even if the comedy is dark. When Lansdale decides to write a dark novel that isn’t meant as a comedy, few writers are better at pushing the reader’s buttons of dread. I admire Lansdale’s versatility, but I like him best when he shakes my ability to face the hidden horrors of humanity. At the same time, there are few writers who are more humane than Lansdale, who are better able to look into the frigid darkness and find an ember of hope that deserves to be nurtured.

Richard Dane kills a burglar, quite legitimately, in self-defense. The encounter triggers thoughts of mortality, his and his son’s, who might easily have been shot by the burglar if he had wandered into the living room.

Dane lives in a small Texas town. Local jerks congratulate him for “getting one.” The decent people appreciate that he is going through a rough time because killing, in self-defense or otherwise, should never be a source of pride.

Dane feels compelled to attend the burglar’s burial, despite being warned by the police that the burglar’s father had just been released from prison and might be in the mood for vengeance. The father, Russel, makes a not-so-veiled threat against Dane’s own four-year-old son. The story’s tension builds from that point, as Richard puts bars on his windows and begins to realize that the facts are not what they appeared to be and that threats may be approaching him from unexpected directions.

A colorful and profane private detective named Jim Bob Luke enters the mix, hired by Dane to get to the bottom of an apparent conspiracy, but true to the novel’s tone, a vague sense of menace surrounds the man. Eventually Jim Bob and Russel and Dane chase a mystery, only to make a horrifying discovery.

Cold in July is the kind of story that confronts relatively good people with hard moral choices. The story eventually gives Dane the opportunity to act as a vigilante in what seems to him (and possibly the reader) to be a just cause. Typical vigilante fiction features a resolute and self-righteous protagonist with military training and lots of guns who makes the world a better place by cleaning up the polluting people he defines as scum. Dane is just an ordinary guy. He doesn’t see himself killing anyone. Whether he will or won’t take on the vigilante role and what effect that choice will have on him is the question than builds suspense in the novel’s second half. Readers can debate whether Dane makes the right choice, which is part of the reason to read a book like Cold in July. Lansdale makes clear that there really is no choice that can clearly be viewed as morally correct.  Whatever Dane does will lead to harm, and any choice he makes will leave a permanent scar on his soul.

Lansdale always tells a good story and he doesn’t waste words doing it. His characters are as real as they need to be. Readers understand a character's essential characteristics without wading through every detail of their formative years. Lansdale avoids making the villains stereotypes by largely ignoring them. We know what they did, but we don’t know them as people. Nor do we need to know them. The focus instead is on the good guys, who are flawed but far from evil, making it easy for the reader to hope for the best when the shooting starts.

Cold in July builds suspense until the story reaches its bloody climax. It isn’t possible to close one’s eyes when reading a book, but readers might find themselves holding their breath. I don’t know if the movie adaptation is any good (Roger Ebert didn’t think so), but Cold in July played as a thumbs up movie in my mind.

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Bubba and the Cosmic Blood Suckers by Joe Lansdale

Published by Subterranean on October 31, 2017

Joe Lansdale is a versatile writer. He’s churned out westerns, horror novels, science fiction, and a ton of crime novels. Some of his books approach the subject matter seriously, many are written as comedy, and some are a blend. He never fails to entertain, but occasional efforts, including this one, seem dashed off. Lansdale wrote the story as a prequel to Bubba Ho-Tep, a novella that was made into a movie several years ago, so maybe he was kicking the idea around for a while and felt the need to jot it down.

One of my favorite horror novels is Lansdale’s The Bottoms, a truly frightening story. As you might guess from the title, Bubba and the Cosmic Blood Suckers plays with the horror genre but the story’s tongue-in-cheek nature makes it more funny than scary. Still, the creatures Lansdale describes in the opening chapter (written as a straight horror story) demonstrate how capably Lansdale can scare the pants off his readers. Had he written this as a straight horror story, I might have wet the bed.

So perhaps it's fortunate that Lansdale quickly introduces Elvis and his team of monster fighters, led by his manager, Colonel Parker. Already, I’m sure, you can see the potential for humor. This is a jaded Elvis, at the peak of his career and starting to lose control of his weight. He still has his charisma (and still has a lot of sex), but the charisma is attracting a dark force from another dimension. The “cosmic blood suckers” in the novel’s title actually feed on charisma more than blood, which makes Elvis a prime target.

Johnny Smack, who tells some of the story in the form of journal entries, is one of Elvis’ bodyguards. He is also part of the Hidden Agenda, a group that for centuries has battled monsters. After bodies are discovered of unidentified people who have had their innards sucked out, Richard Nixon sends Hidden Agenda on a mission to tame the responsible monsters. The Colonel, Johnny Smack, John Henry, a charismatic singer named Jenny, a wizard named Jack, and a fellow called the Blind Man join Elvis on the Hidden Agenda team.

The concept is goofy enough to be funny, and Lansdale adds characteristic bits of humor in nearly every paragraph. One of my favorites is a barrier to keep ghouls away that is made from ashes from incinerated corpses mixed with nun pee, but there are too many examples to count. One of the funniest passages involves Elvis’ sexual encounter with a ghost. Well, it’s Elvis, so he really can’t refuse.

I can’t say I laughed out loud at much of the goofiness, but I was consistently amused and entertained. Lansdale can do that without even trying, but the story does give the impression that he didn’t try very hard. I look forward to Lansdale returning to meatier work, but in the meantime, there’s nothing wrong with being amused.

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Hap and Leonard: Blood and Lemonade by Joe R. Lansdale

Published by Tachyon Publications on March 14, 2017

Hap and Leonard: Blood and Lemonade is a collection of stories about Hap Collins when he was young and his developing friendship with Leonard Pine. Most of the stories appear here for the first time, although one of the most powerful, a story about bullying and abusive parenting called “The Boy Who Became Invisible,” was published in 2009. The stories are woven together with an overlaid narrative that consists of Hap and Leonard telling stories to each other or to Hap’s family.

After Hap and Leonard discuss the problem with modern schools (they don’t allow self-defense and thus teach kids to be victims), illustrated by a story from Hap’s school days, we learn how Hap and Leonard met. Naturally, it involves a fight. This is followed by the story of the first time they fought together (a story that appears in a volume of Hap and Leonard stories by the same publisher).

Some of the other stories are light, some are dark, most are a mix. Some tell about Hap’s family and the town where he grew up. Some are about crimes he witnessed, or their aftermath. One is a ghost story his daddy told him. One is a story about snakes and what they teach us about people. Leonard appears in some, but not all, of the stories. This is a Hap-centric volume.

The best stories are about tolerance, an American value that has always been in short supply in much of America. The title story, “Blood and Lemonade,” is about perceptions of race in Texas during Hap’s childhood. As Leonard says at a couple of different points in the book, things have changed, but not enough. The story teaches a profound lesson about taking the good with the bad, and not allowing the bad to taint the good.

All of the stories are solid contributions to Hap and Leonard lore, but they are also solid stories of the kind that Joe Lansdale does so well.

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Coco Butternut by Joe R. Lansdale

Published by Subterranean Press on January 31, 2017

Coco Butternut is a novella-length story. It isn’t the funniest Hap & Leonard story I’ve read but it has its moments. More than enough moments, in fact, to earn a recommendation, at least for readers who are familiar with the characters.

Hap and Leonard are called upon to deliver money to a blackmailer in exchange for the disinterred body of a mummified dachshund named Coco Butternut. The job seems simple, but nothing is ever simple for Hap and Leonard.

As usual when Hap and Leonard get involved in a case, dead bodies appear. Human bodies, not just the mummified dog. And as usual, getting paid doesn’t work out quite as they planned.

Hap’s daughter Chance plays a supporting role in the story, as well as his partner/lover Brett. Adding to the banter is their primary role, but it’s hard to top the banter that Hap and (especially) Leonard provide as they point out each other’s faults.

Coco Butternut doesn’t advance the characters, but it tells an amusing story that fans will appreciate. I suspect that newcomers will benefit from reading earlier installments in the series before turning their attention to this one.

Joe Lansdale has written excellent novels and stories across a variety of genres. I enjoy Hap and Leonard and I’m glad Lansdale is achieving financial success with those characters, but I hope he finds time to diversify his current output. Not that it matters much, because I enjoy everything he writes. He’s a fine storyteller and his irreverent sense of humor matches my own, but I'm an even bigger fan of his not so funny but exceptionally chilling horror novels.

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The Thicket by Joe Lansdale

Published by Mulholland Books on September 10, 2013

Give Joe Lansdale credit for versatility. He's written mysteries and suspense novels, science fiction and horror, comic books and cartoons. If he isn't making your bones shake with fear, he's making your teeth rattle with laughter. The Thicket is an old-fashioned western with a modern sensibility and a considerable amount of humor. Many books make me smile but few make me laugh-out-loud. This one did, repeatedly -- when I wasn't gagging at Lansdale's descriptions of carnage and mayhem.

In an attention-grabbing first sentence, we learn that sixteen-year-old Jack Parker will "take up with a gun-shooting dwarf, the son of a slave, and a big angry hog" before finding true love and killing someone. After Jack's parents (like many others in East Texas) die of smallpox, Jack's grandfather decides to send Jack and his sister Lola to live with their aunt in Kansas. Before they travel far, desperados make off with Lola. Hence Jack's need to take up with gun-shooting folk who can help him track the bad guys. Eustace, the slave's son, is a semi-reliable tracker. Shorty, the gun-shooting dwarf, learned his craft from Annie Oakley. The angry hog is named Hog. Eventually a woman of ill-repute named Jimmie Sue joins the posse, as well as two others. The search take them to the Big Thicket, a hiding place for all things evil.

It's easy to feel sympathy for Jack, who does his best to maintain his naïve innocence despite his dark experiences in a rough world, and for Jimmie Sue, who has had a difficult life. More surprising is the sympathy Lansdale creates for Eustace and Shorty. They are violent and greedy but not truly evil -- they generally direct their violence (if not their thievery) at people who deserve it -- and their status as underdogs makes it easy to cheer for them. Some of the characters are so outrageous that liking them isn't an issue, including the sheriff who only ever shot three women "in the line of duty, or nearabouts." As always, Lansdale creates landscapes and attitudes that draw the reader into the time and place in which the novel is set.

The Thicket is often a funny novel but it isn't shallow. Lansdale's characters occasionally debate the meaning of life, paying particular attention to faith and prayer. Jack's grandfather taught him that comforting religious beliefs are preferable to thinking "too much on my own, cause it might lead to other ideas that might be right but unpleasant." Shorty argues that faith in God's will leads to "disappointment and false expectations." Jack's Christian teachings, cautioning against vengeance and urging him to turn the other cheek, are at odds with the more violent but arguably more effective methods that Eustace and Shorty believe will help them find Lola. Still, this isn't a heavy philosophical tome. Lansdale uses the discussions of morality to poke good natured fun at hypocrisy.

Some aspects of the story (like the hooker with a heart of gold) are clichéd but the clichés are played for laughs -- and more often than not Lansdale gives the cliché a little twist. Fans of shoot-outs will be amused by the most hilarious gunfight I've encountered. Gore aside, The Thicket left me smiling.

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